Me and My Dysphoria Monster

September 5, 2022
ender nonconforming child Nisha, depicted with brown skin, learns to follow the compass of her inner voice in this picture book that visualizes gender dysphoria as a scribbly blue “monster.” Nisha’s loving family and friends can’t see the dark, amorphous entity that grows larger when she feels gender dysphoria—“When someone refers to me as a boy,” when she is told to use the boys’ restroom, and when she visits the beach. That is, until Jack, a trans adult who peacefully coexists with his dysphoria monster, explains: “Our monster is that little voice that knows who we are, and who we want to be when we grow up.” Ang’s saturated illustrations depict the child’s day-to-day, and the strength gained in speaking with a queer elder, as Nisha starts living authentically, adjusting her gender presentation, pronouns, and name, and learning to see the “monster” as information. Back matter includes a comprehensive terminology guide for adult readers. Ages 6–10.

August 1, 2022
Nisha, a young trans girl, discusses her experience living with gender dysphoria. A floating monster that resembles outer space is the visual metaphor for the protagonist's nebulous but crushing feeling of gender dysphoria. Nisha, who is brown-skinned, is not sure exactly what is going on, but she knows she hates being called a boy. In a heartbreakingly authentic moment, she laments that the monster only listens to other people, not her own pleas for it to go away. Her mother, who is brown-skinned, and her father, who is light-skinned, introduce her to Jack, an Asian-presenting trans man with his own dysphoria monster--except his, a cute little frog sitting on his shoulder, doesn't cause him too much trouble. After getting some guidance from Jack and then talking to her parents, Nisha begins using she/her/hers pronouns and using the girls' restroom at school; soon, her monster shrinks to a little squidlike creature that is still present but is much easier to manage. This book will speak to and delight trans children of various experiences, though it does rely somewhat on the visual shorthand of gender stereotypes (flouncy dresses being associated with girlhood, for instance), and at one point, Nisha is told she seems much taller and has a much deeper voice than most girls--traits that wouldn't apply to a child her age. Still, the lesson is uplifting while still being realistic, and the text flows easily except for an awkward tense change at one point. The illustrations are cute and colorful, with a high-contrast cartoony style. (This book was reviewed digitally.) A charming book for trans kids and those seeking to build understanding. (explanation of terminology and information on gender identity for adults) (Picture book. 4-8)

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